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When Life Isn’t Fair

Life is hard. We have so many things thrown at us each and every day, and yet, it seems that others have it so easy and get everything they wanted. Learn how to change your perspective and start loving the life God created you for.
Life isn’t fair. How many times have you said this? Or perhaps you’ve heard it a time or two.

The plain and simple truth? Life really isn’t fair.

When you’re busting your hump, trying to live a life you can be proud of and yet, junk still continues to be thrown at you, how do you handle it? How do you handle being down and out when you see your friends seemingly getting everything they’ve ever wanted?

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Years ago, I was struck with a chronic illness. One that has turned not only my life but my family’s life, upside down. I can assure you, this is certainly not the life my husband and I had envisioned when we said, “I do.”

Instead of fun parties and lots of travel, our life consists of many missed days of work, spending days on end in bed. Countless trips to the neurologist’s office, local doc in a box, ER, and even several hospital stays. 

Missed work means lost income. Lost income means a life of difficult financial decisions, saying “no,” time and again to invitations, missed ball games and special events.

In other words, living an unfair life while everyone around us seems to be living it up.

Some People Seem to Have it All

I can’t tell you how many times I’d see someone else traveling, going out to dinner, or spending an afternoon at a local festival and think, “life just isn’t fair!”

Honestly, just reading back over that makes me cringe inside. Who is this person that was spending so much time focusing on everything she didn’t have instead of everything she did?

It was me, and I didn’t like the person I was seeing. (If you haven’t already, be sure to read What I’ve Learned from My Chronic Illness.)

It’s Time for a Change in Perspective

I’ve learned some incredible lessons on this journey of self-pity. The biggest one is that when I’m starting to feel that life isn’t fair, it means I’m focusing on the few challenges I have in my life rather than all the incredible blessings I have!

It means it’s time for a change in perspective! 

How about you? Do you need a change in perspective?

Yes, some people get to travel more than you do. Some people get to drop as much money as they want on a fun shopping trip. Some people don’t have the financial responsibilities that you do. Some people aren’t living with a chronic illness.

Some people just seem to have everything. The key word here, my friend, is “seem!”

We truly have no idea what’s going on in someone else’s life. Looking from the outside, it looks like they have it all, but the reality is maybe they do and maybe they don’t.

God Has a Beautiful Plan for You

Here’s the thing you’ve got to remember. Each and every one of us is exactly where God wants us to be, exactly where we need to be to fulfill His plan for us. And when we stay faithful and obedient to Him, He will reward us.

Maybe not today or tomorrow, and perhaps not even with earthly things, but with something far more important, far more glorious than we can ever begin to imagine.

So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up. Galatians 6:9

A change in perspective is all you need. Don’t get down about the circumstances you’re in. Stop focusing on everything you don’t have and begin to rejoice in all you do! 

When You Start Down that Ugly Road of Thinking Life Isn’t Fair, Remember This

  1. First and foremost, God is the only one that knows what’s going on in someone else’s life. So to be on the outside, looking in, you really don’t know the whole story.
  2. You are right where God wants you to be.
  3. You may not be equipped to handle what someone else has, and that’s o.k. They probably aren’t equipped to handle what you have in your life.
  4. Stop comparing your beginning to someone else’s middle. If you’re looking at someone else’s life and what they have vs. what you don’t, you’re playing the comparison game and that’s the quickest path to unhappiness and feeling that life isn’t fair. (Ask me……I struggled with the comparison game for far too long!)
  5. God has created us all for different, yet equally important, jobs. 
  6. He is going to use you right where you are, and it’s going to be big! You just have to open your heart to it.

It’s time, my friend, for a change in perspective.

When we give up this notion that life isn’t fair, we are free to love unconditionally. We are free to enjoy this incredible life that’s going on around us.

15 Best Prayer Journals to help you strengthen your prayer life and walk closer to God. Be sure to check out 15 Best Prayer Journals to Strengthen Your Prayer Life.

How to Change Your Perspective

How do you keep going when you feel that life isn’t fair? When junk keeps being thrown at you, and you can’t seem to ever catch a break?

  • You go to God and ask Him to change your perspective. Ask Him to open your eyes and heart to His Will.
  • Every time you find yourself starting to dwell on how unfair life is, think of one thing you’re grateful for and then thank Him for that blessing.

It takes practice. This isn’t something that’s going to change overnight. You’re going to have to work at. But as sure as I’m typing this right now, I know that God is going to show up for you.

Your heart will begin to change and you’ll learn to love the life you’re living and to be genuinely happy for those around you. 

So, my friend, start with your prayers. Continually go to God and ask Him to show you how to start living your life with gratitude and excitement, because I’m telling you, He’s got big plans for you and if you’re too busy focusing on how unfair life is, you’re going to miss it!

I’m so glad you stopped by the blog today. Be sure to comment below and tell me one of the many blessings you have in your life right now!

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Also, if you need more help in deepening your relationship with God, make sure you check out my 30-Day devotional, Finding Peace in the Mess! You can get all the details by clicking here.

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Have you ever found yourself saying, “I’ll start again with God next week.”

Maybe you used to start your mornings with prayer, but lately your Bible has stayed closed and you feel like you’re constantly trying to catch up with God.

Maybe life has started demanding more than usual.

The kids need to be picked up, dinner still needs to be made and the laundry pile is growing faster than you can fold it. And by the time you finally sit down at the end of the day, you’re too exhausted to even say a prayer.

At first, you tell yourself you’ll get back to it tomorrow — but tomorrow comes and goes. Then a few more days pass. Before long, missing one day turns into three, then three days turn into a week.

And that’s when the guilt starts creeping in. Before you know it, you’re thinking to yourself, “I’ve failed again.”

Or maybe it’s been longer than a week. Maybe it’s been months — even years — since you really felt close to God, and you’re wondering if starting over is even possible at this point.

Either way, the question underneath is the same. Why do I keep ending up here?

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How to Pray for Your Husband When You Don’t Know What to Say

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You noticed it at dinner.

Your husband was quieter than usual, and when you asked how work went, he said, “Fine.” But you’ve been married long enough to know when fine doesn’t really mean fine.

You knew something was weighing on him — something just felt off.

Later that night, lying beside him in the dark, you wished you knew how to help. So you did the one thing you knew you could do — you prayed, “Lord, help him.”

It was honest and exactly what you wanted God to do. But almost as soon as you said it, you started wondering if you should have said more.

Is that really enough? Shouldn’t I know how to pray for my own husband?

Maybe you’ve joined the 31-day prayer challenges for wives, or you started the prayer book that’s still sitting on your nightstand with a bookmark somewhere around chapter three. You’ve heard other women pray confidently for their husbands, covering everything from his work and health to your husband’s relationships, protection, and spiritual life.

Meanwhile, you’re struggling just to put one sentence together.

And when you love someone this much, it’s easy for that struggle to start feeling like more than simply not knowing what to say. You begin wondering if you’re doing this “right” or whether your prayers for him are making any difference at all.

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