Have you been begging and pleading for God to take you out of the excruciatingly painful situation you’re in? When your life is downright hard, and you’re mad at God because He doesn’t seem to care, how on earth are you supposed to find the words to pray?
And yet, here you are…still walking on that dark valley floor with absolutely no idea how to get out. I have no doubt you are exhausted, weary, and sick and tired of pleading with Him to bring you out of it. For your convenience, this post contains affiliate links. This means that if you purchase a product using the links below, through your cost do not change, I may receive a small commission for it. For more information, see our privacy and disclaimers.
I was Too ANGRY at God to Ask for Help
Not long ago, I found myself downright livid with God.
I was going through some pretty scary and extensive tests. I was sick, could barely put one foot in front of the other, and it seemed to be getting worse by the day.
I had all kinds of tests and blood work, from bone marrow biopsies, (talk about painful!) endoscopies, GI biopsies, and infusions. I’d been run through the gamut at a time when it took all I had to pick myself up out of bed to even get a shower. (And truthfully, there were many days a shower just didn’t happen.).
As test after test came back negative, I began losing all hope of figuring out what was happening to me.
So as we were laying all our hope on one final test to give us the answers, I completely lost it when it, too, came back negative.
As I got into the car after my doctor’s appointment, I turned the radio up loud and just started driving. I didn’t want to go home, I didn’t want to talk to anyone, and I certainly had nothing left to say to God!
I imagine that since you’re here, you are feeling or have felt the same way. Life is annihilating you with so much pain and heartache, and at this point, God doesn’t seem to be helping you in any way.
How are you supposed to pray when you’re angry? What are the right words when all you want to do is yell and scream? Is God mad at you because you aren’t handling it in a way that is pleasing to Him?
How to Talk to God
Here’s the incredible thing about God, my friend. He can take it!
He can take your anger, he can take your frustration, and He can and will soothe that pain you are in.
God’s not mad at you, no matter what you’ve done.
There is absolutely nothing you could do that would cause Him to turn away from you.
Whether you’re angry or hurt, you can tell God how you feel. It’s ok to ask God for help.
So go to Him. Tell Him your frustrations, that you don’t have the energy to keep moving, and that you are angry and can’t take any more.
Your prayers don’t have to be PERFECT to be Effective
When you are so far down in that valley, trying to come up with the right words is really hard.
In fact, as I mentioned in my story above, it’s entirely possible that you’re too angry to even want to pray.
When you can learn to trust in God, the pressure of knowing what to say and how to pray with the right attitude begins to melt away!
This is when you can confidently lay your troubles at His feet and finally find rest from the pain you are in. God loves you unconditionally, so there’s no pressure to pray in a perfectly manicured script.
25 But if we hope for what is still unseen by us, we wait for it with patience and composure.26 So too the [Holy] Spirit comes to our aid and bears us up in our weakness; for we do not know what prayer to offer nor how to offer it worthily as we ought, but the Spirit Himself goes to meet our supplication and pleads in our behalf with unspeakable yearnings and groanings too deep for utterance. Romans 8:25-26 NLT
I don’t know about you, but this scripture brings me great comfort in knowing that my words don’t have to be perfect. And in fact, it shows us that our prayers don’t have to be rehearsed or meticulously thought out to talk to God and hear him.
If The Spirit can go to our mighty God with deep groanings, then surely our God can take our prayers in whatever way we can give them!
Yep, even if you say,
God, I’m so angry right now. I am trying to be patient through this suffering, but I’m growing tired and I can’t do it on my own.
Holy moly, just a simple prayer like that and your God will show up in an amazing way!
there’s no point in trying to hide
God already knows your heart. He knows what you are thinking, so there’s absolutely no point in trying to hide it.
Whether you’re angry or mad, exhausted or weary, your God knows how you’re feeling, and by simply going to Him in earnest and talking through it with Him, He will help you to see this situation through His eyes.
He’ll show you that no matter what happens in this challenge, or how long this season is, He will be right beside you every step of the way.
Simply whispering, “Lord, I need you,” will bring you unimaginable strength.
Steps in Praying to Arm yourself AHEAD OF TIME
There are three important steps that I take to ensure that I’m armed with God’s promises and truths.
- Begin every morning in His word.
- Write down my favorite encouraging scripture (using different translations from Bible Gateway).
- Write out some prayers that I can keep with me at all times.
When you begin the day learning the truth about God and His promises, you will be armed for anything the day throws at you.
Likewise, when another challenge has hit you in your day, with your favorite scriptures written down, you can remind yourself that no matter how difficult your day is, no matter how angry you are, God has already won the victory and absolutely nothing can destroy you.
And finally, write down a couple of prayers so that when you become too exasperated to pray, you’ll have immediate access to help you through.
(Download our FREE blank prayer cards so you can have your prayers handy when you’re too angry to pray. Simply subscribe to our newsletter below and get instant access to them along with all of our FREE resources.)
A prayer that I often pray in the morning is one I found in The Beyond Suffering Bible,
Remind me Lord, to take a pause throughout the day, to think about you, to set my mind on you, and to be refreshed by you. Carry me from strength to strength.
How to Have Patience when Suffering
Somehow it doesn’t seem right that God wants us to “suffer patiently.” I mean honestly, why do we have to suffer at all?
And yet 1 Peter 2:19 tells us
For God is pleased when, conscious of his will, you patiently endure unjust treatment.
I guess this is the perfect time to tell you that you were created to glorify God. Simple as that.
When you patiently suffer in your circumstances, you are showing God’s light to others. You are bringing them into His Kingdom by allowing His love to shine through you, not even, but in the wake of some of the most difficult times in your life.
I found this to be completely true not long ago when I had someone pull me aside and ask, “Tammy, how do you do it? How do you still trust in God when you are suffering so much in your life right now?”
This, my friend, was exactly what 1 Peter 2, teaches us. That in our suffering, if we can still let His Light shine, it points others to Him.
And here’s the thing… if in my suffering, I can point someone else to God, then by golly, I’m going to do it with patience, even if I still let my anger take over from time to time.
So in the midst of your anger, ask God to show you how you can best serve Him. Ask Him to calm your fears and to show you how you can be a blessing to others. Ask Him to help you to be invisible so that He can be visible and shine through you.
It’s time for a change in perspective
Today you have a choice to make.
Are you going to change your perspective in your suffering? Are you going to choose to focus on the many blessings that God has given you?
Or are you going to choose to wallow in the self-pity of how hard your journey is?
Don’t get me wrong. There have been plenty of times that I’ve chosen the latter. There have been many occasions where I have chosen to pull the covers over my head and not face the day.
If you’ve chosen the latter as well, it’s o.k.
You are living in this incredibly difficult world. But the important thing to remember is to take a break if you must, but then turn to God and ask Him to change your perspective. Ask for Him to teach you in this season.
He has a plan for you that you can not even begin to comprehend. God will bring something beautiful out of this difficult journey you are on. There’s no way for you to understand this struggle you are in because you can’t see the big picture. Only God can.
So it’s time to learn to stand on the truth that He has it all under control. Even when it feels like there is no way out.
Just as you’ll never understand the mystery of life forming in a pregnant woman, So you’ll never understand the mystery at work in all that God does. Ecclesiates 11:5 MSG
I know this suffering you are in is painful.
I know it feels like it’s never going to end, but it’s in your suffering where God is sculpting you into the person He created you to be. Into the person that He’ll use for a bigger purpose.
So in your prayers, ask God to open your eyes to what He has to teach you. Tell Him that you don’t need to know the big picture, only the next step.
And then rest in knowing that God already has it figured out, therefore, you don’t need to have all the answers.
Back on that day when I was so angry with God, I can now look back and see that I was and am so grateful for those negative test results.
You see, they were testing me for several forms of cancer, and I praise my God above that they all came back negative.
He was looking out for me and my best interest. He was looking at the big picture, while I could only see it from my narrow point of view. And I’m so grateful that that wasn’t my story.
So whether you have a cancer diagnosis, a failing marriage, financial problems, difficulties with a child or parent, you can go to God. You can ask for His perspective and trust that He always has your best interest at heart.
And even when you are bitter and angry and aren’t seeing the results you’d like to see, praise Him for taking care of you, and ask that He open your heart to what He is teaching you in this storm.
Then, and only then, will you be able to offer yourself grace when you are angry, when you don’t know how to pray to God or what to say in prayer, and when you’re too tired to fight any longer.
Thanks for stopping by the blog today. Be sure to say hello before you leave.
Don’t forget to download our FREE blank prayer cards so you can write them down and arm yourself when you’re too angry to pray.
Until next time, my friend…
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Learning how to put our complete trust in God isn’t easy. We say we trust God, but what we really mean is that we trust Him for what we want, when we want it. At Footprints of Inspiration we uncover who you are and why you were created; how to walk in healing through forgiveness; and how to go before the Lord with confidence. Through this journey, you’ll discover that it truly is possible to experience peace, even in the hardest times in your life.
Tammy Rotzoll is the founder and owner of Footprints of Inspiration and podcast host at A Faithful God Podcast (which can be found on your favorite podcast player). She lives in Virginia with her husband and together they’re learning how to navigate their fun, new adventure as empty nesters.
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